


Wingman

by Ashiepants



Series: Head Over Feet [18]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Alcohol, F/M, Friendship, Gen, Hungover, M/M, Romance, gay clubs, wingman
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2015-08-25
Packaged: 2018-04-17 03:02:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4649754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashiepants/pseuds/Ashiepants
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sonny accompanies Walt to the bar, a new experience. Walt hooks up with a familiar face.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wingman

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah Barba is in this now. Which I'm stoked on. But he still won't be a main focus. Still nervous about writing him.  
> Ps. Sorry it is so long. It writes itself sometimes.

"You're so hungover!" Alex laughed as she reached into the fridge for milk. She set it on the table in front of Sonny. "I told you not to go out!"

He pulled the cereal box towards himself. "I didn't have to pay for a drink all night. I guess I had more than I thought."

She giggled. "And Walt...?"

Sonny turned pink. 

"If he hooked up you can say that." Alex sat down with her coffee. "It's not that surprising."

"It's not that he hooked up...more about with who he did that hooking up." He hastily ate Cheerios. "I don't even know what they...did."

She rolled her eyes. "We're all adults. I thought I might see you two cuddled up on my bed when I got home this morning."

He rolled his eyes. "Oh haha. Walt woulda loved that."

"He's mostly playing...I think." She added. "I still can't believe he talked you into it. You had fun then?"

"Yeah, I mean it was kinda nice having drinks bought for me." He smiled. 

"Welcome to my world sweetheart." Alex laughed. 

"Guys buy you drinks?" He asked jealously. "Where? At your friend, Sarah's bar?"

"Calm down jealous." She smirked. "Sarah usually just gives me drinks but I mean sometimes guys do. Not like I spend much time out lately anyway."

"Sorry." He grimaced. "Anyway, it was fun. Walt kept getting lost, but I made new friends."

"Oh really?" She raised her eyebrows. "Anyone I should worry about?"

"Well-" Sonny started but Walt came through the front door at the same time. 

"Sonny!" He grinned when he saw him. "Morning Sonnyshine!"

"Morning to you too, slut." Alex smiled. 

Walt sauntered over to the coffee maker. "Your boyfriend is a great wingman. Did you know one of the Assistant district Attorneys he works with is an adorable little Cuban?" 

Alex's jaw dropped open. "My brother slept with your coworker!"

"I don't know if Barba counts as a coworker, but he handles most of our cases." Sonny explained. 

"He is also muy guapo." Walt wiggled his eyebrows. 

"Barba? The guy that lives to give you shit?" Alex was incredulous. "How did that even-? I didn't know he was gay!"

"I can't believe you couldn't tell. Gaydar must be broken, Lex." Walt smirked. 

"Well I've never met him, just what Sonny tells me." She explained. "I only know Fin because I knew him before. Everyone else is just a name and a random fact. Rollins-southern, Sergeant Benson-adopted a baby, Barba-kind of an asshole."

"Hope, annoying. Devon, murse." Sonny listed her coworkers. Alex smiled. 

"Barba's not really an asshole, just a hard ass." Sonny explained. "I learn a lot from him."

"I'm sure he could teach you a great many other things Sonny." Walt smiled. 

"He's a jerk." Alex maintained. "And I can't believe you hooked up with him. I mean I know you love Latinos but..."

"I'm telling you!" Walt added with the tone of a gossipy teenage girl. "He was so sexy, I could've made out with him for hours!"

"Really, Barba?! I mean the guys a genius but he's also kinda OLD." Sonny added. 

Walt raised his eyebrows "Says the guy with greying temples."

Sonny touched his hair. "Shut up!"

Alex shrugged. "It's kinda sexy. You must be really passionate about your work and the stress is making your hair turn."

"So passionate you're getting hotter." Walt added. 

"Now you just need that mustache and less product..." Alex started. 

"A mustache?" Walt made a face. "Ew, no! Just a nice 5 o'clock shadow, messy hair, grey temples, blue shirt, dark grey suit. The badge. Unf!"

"Do you guys have a paper doll of me somewhere?" Sonny had turned pink. 

"Are you not into being objectified?" Alex laughed. "Sorry. You're just very sexy baby." She leaned out and kissed his cheek. 

"Yeah baby." Walt did the same thing on the other side. 

"Walter!" Sonny made a sour face and wiped his cheek. 

Walt just laughed. "Anyway your little friend was HOT!"

"That's more than I wanted to know." Sonny went back to his Cheerios. 

Alex smirked. "Did you wrap it up?"

Sonny spit Cheerios as he laughed.

"I have a no glove no love policy Lex, you know that"

"Seriously you guys too much info!" Sonny shook his head. "I have to see this guy at work!"

Walt rolled his eyes. "Anyway. Thanks for going with me. I knew you'd be a good wingman."  
****  
Yesterday

"Knock knock!" Walt called through the door. 

Alex opened it. "Hey, what are you doing here?"

"Just my weekly interruption of your sex life. Hey Sonny!" He called as he walked through the door. 

Sonny grunted. Alex rolled her eyes. 

"I spent the night in Brooklyn and I knew you'd be home and I was hungry." He explained. "So whatcha got?"

"Spent the night in Brooklyn, huh?" Alex cocked her head. 

"Eggs. Toast. Bacon." Sonny pointed out. "Coffee." He lifted his cup. 

"What's the matter, pookie?" Walt sat down. 

"Nothin'" he frowned, still bitter about the previous night when Alex fell asleep on his advances. 

"He's tired. He's been studying non-stop. He was up all night." Alex replied, sitting down. "But he still made me breakfast." She blew him a kiss. 

"Oh how romantic." Walt made retching noises.

"Yeah and I can't catch a break with this one..." Sonny looked at Alex and then just shrugged it off. 

Walt raised his eyebrows at his sister and she shook her head to say 'don't ask.'

"Well I'll eat eggs." Walt said. "I'm eating kosher."

Alex rolled her eyes. "Kosher? You eat kosher when you think you're getting fat and want to lose 5lbs."

"I do it because I'm an observant Jew!" He scoffed. "And fuck you, Lexi, I'm going to that bakery mom likes and buying some macaroons and you can't have any! Only for people who eat kosher!"

"Macaroons are like cookies right?" Sonny perked up. "I can be Kosher." 

"Babe, with all due respect, no you can't." Alex smirked, stealing bacon off his plate. "No bacon!"

"Oh...fuck that!" He pursed her lips and took a new piece from the plate in the middle of the table. "I can still have some cookies, doh? Right, Walt?"

"Do you think I'm fat?" Walt asked.

"No...?" Sonny raised an eyebrow as he answered. 

"Then sure Sonny. I'll bring you a cookie." Walt nodded. 

Sonny grinned ear to ear and Alex rolled her eyes.

"You're such an ass." Alex commented. "It's just 'cause you think he's hot!"

Sonny blushed furiously. 

"Don't hate him because he's beautiful." Walt mooned at Sonny, and stroked his cheek. "Did you ever think you were gay Sonny? Like even for a second?"

"What?" He fought Walt off. "No!"

"You were never curious...?" He smiled. 

"Ew, why are you being a creep to my boyfriend?" Alex stole the last piece of toast. 

"I don't want you to waste any time with him if he'd really rather be with me. It's from a place of love, big sis." He clutched his heart dramatically. 

Alex rolled her eyes hard. "He's not Danny Stoller!" 

"Who's Danny-" Sonny started. 

"He dated Lexi for like 3 weeks in college and then he met me at a party and...he wasn't straight." Walt smirked. Alex threw food at him. 

"Well sorry to burst your bubble, Walt, but I'm straight as an arrow." Sonny drew a straight line with his hand. 

"Uh huh," Walt nodded while reading his phone. "Hey, who wants to go out tonight?"

"Can't, working 7-7." Alex shook her head. 

"Sonny, you ever been wingman for a gay dude?" Walt turned to him. 

"I don't have anything going on tonight." He perked up. 

"You know he means OUT out, like at a gay bar?" Alex smirked. 

"So they got beer there, right?" Sonny shrugged. 

"Beer! Oh my god you are straight. This is gonna be fun!" Walt was gleeful. 

"Are you sure you should Sonny? Your test is next week." Alex gave him a look. 

"I deserve a night off!" He rolled his eyes. "I'm in."

Alex pouted. 

"I'll bring him home at a decent hour Mrs. Carisi!" Walt mocked his sister. 

"I studied all week I'm going out!" Sonny insisted. 

"Just keep him away from the tequila." Alex warned.

"What am I? A gremlin, don't feed me after midnight?" Sonny laughed. "We're doing this!"  
****  
"I'm not wearing the wrong thing am I?" Sonny worried as he pulled his ID out for the bouncer. 

"As long as you're not wearing a sign for the Westboro Baptist Church I think you're fine." Walt told him and looked him over. "Oh yeah, this is gonna be like a straight guy taking a puppy to a park full single moms."

Sonny grinned and put his hands on Walt's shoulders. "Let's get you laid, soldier."

"Wow and you're not even drunk." Walt smirked back. 

They made their way into the bar and moved towards the back. Where the actual bar was. Walt leaned against the crowded space like a pro, waving down a bald bartender with a thick beard. He nodded at Walt. 

"Rum and diet. Sonny? He'll take a Heineken and a tequila shot." Walt ordered. 

Sonny held up a hand. "Ho hey, I don't need a tequila shot."

"To get ya started. You know how to lick, slam, and suck?"

"Lick what?" Sonny asked, when the shot was placed in front of him and he knocked it back with no hesitation. 

"That's the kinda thing I like to see!" A slight man with bright blue hair watched Sonny with hungry eyes and put his hand on his chest. "What's your name?

Sonny turned red. 

"His name is back off." Walt stepped in front of him. 

The blue haired guy rolled his eyes and walked away muttering about being too butch for him. 

"Jesus!" Sonny widened his eyes. "Aggressive."

"Of course it's aggressive. It's all men." Walt sipped his drink. "We're not flowers no matter what color our flags are."

Sonny took his drink and followed Walt to a table near the bar. 

"People are always like 'who's the girl?' Like nobody is the girl, man! We like dudes!" He shook his head. "You've been to straight bars right?"

Sonny laughed. "Almost exclusively."

"We'll imagine how all the dudes act hitting on girls but multiply it by 2 because there are no girls and everyone is trying to pick up everyone." He explained. "Except you."

"I'm pretty sure some of these guys will try to pick up on me." Sonny smiled. 

"Oh in another universe Al would be giving me advice about you." Walt grinned. 

"So do you have a type?" Sonny asked. 

Walt shrugged. "I'll let you know when I see something I like."

"I'll be anticipating it." Sonny laughed. 

"Hey?" A medium built Puerto Rican man walked over to their table. 

Walt rolled his eyes. "Did you follow me here?"

"No you just never change your hangouts. Who's this gringo?" He asked. 

"Sonny, this is Mat. Mat, Sonny is my sister's boyfriend."

"Yer dating Alex?" Mat asked his accent sounding thicker, but he checked Sonny out. 

"Yeah." Sonny nodded. "Uh, nice to meet you."

"You don't seem like her type"

"Oh," Sonny laughed. "What's her type?"

"No one knows because she never let's anyone meet them." Mateo laughed at his own joke. 

"Well maybe Alex has grown up a little since you last saw her." Sonny said, annoyed. 

"Oh look at the tough straight man." Mat mocked. 

"¿Que pasa, Mateo?" Walt rolled his eyes. 

He answered in Spanish. Sonny just watched and drank his beer like it was some fascinating sporting event. Their exchange seemed to rapidly turn into an argument 

"You threw my stuff into the street!" Walt suddenly yelled, in English. "You're the biggest drama queen there is!"

Mat rolled his eyes. 

"Whoa, hey is this necessary?" Sonny suddenly stood up. 

"No it's not." Walt glared at Mateo. "You can leave now."

"Okay, but don't call me when you don't wanna stay with your mommy, k?" Mateo snapped and walked away into another part of the bar and out of their sights. 

Walt groaned and put his head on his arms. 

"Maybe another drink?" Sonny asked, trying to diffuse the situation. 

"2 shots of tequila, whatever boy drink you're getting, and another rum and diet." Walt looked up briefly. "Please." He added from his face down position.

"No shots, c'mon!" Sonny groaned. 

"Both of those are for me." Walt smirked. "You sure you're gonna be okay at the bar alone?"

"What's the worst that could happen?"

"You could be penetrated."

Sonny rolled his eyes and made his way to the bar anyway. When he returned he brought 4 shots of tequila and went back for the beer and Walt's drink. 

"Do I look like I need to drown my sorrows?" Walt asked. 

"No," Sonny grinned. "I can't make you drink alone."

"No limes?" Walt asked. 

"Is that what you're supposed to do?" Sonny asked. 

"Do I have to teach you everything?" Walt got up and returned with a small bowl of limes and a salt shaker. "Alright, lick your hand like this..."

Sonny followed suit, feeling like someone had to be watching this unfold. 

"Pour some salt." Walt demonstrated. "Now lick the salt off, drink the shot, and suck on the lime. Listo?"

Sonny nodded. 

"L'chaim!" He clinked glasses with Sonny and they both drank. 

Sonny shook his head and shut his eyes as the shot settled down his throat. "I think, I'm gonna pay for this." He chased it with beer. 

Walt grinned. "C'mon the others are getting cold."

"We can't wait like a minute?"

"Nope these are the rules, you get wasted. Then you dance. Then you hook up and head out." Walt grinned. 

"Alright give me a sec." Sonny could already feel the liquor making it's way through him. He took another long pull from his beer and grinned stupidly at Walt. 

"This is perf-" Walt burped. "Perfect! Sorry."

They took the second and this time Sonny did it in the wrong order, licking salt of his hand at the end and making a face. Walt laughed at him. 

"Shut up!" Sonny yelled much too loud. 

Walt eyed him. "Was Al right? Can you hold your liquor?"

"I'll be fine!" Sonny made a face at him. "I haven't even helped you pick up some guy."

Walt laughed and reached out to Sonny. "You're a good friend." 

He hugged Sonny with one arm but then leaned into the hug nuzzling his neck. Sonny widened his eyes but then pulled his arm around and awkwardly hugged him back. 

"Alright, buddy." Sonny slapped his back. "Oh SHIT! Seriously?!"

Walt backed up. "Oh, man, I'm sorry Sonn.."

"No, man, that ADA that busts my chops is here and just spotted me!" Sonny looked like a deer caught in the headlights. 

Walt looked back over his shoulder then faced forward with a coy smile. "The middle aged Latino?! SONNY!! Oh my god, he's coming over here. Look at his SUIT!"

Walt blushed. 

"Huh?" Sonny wasn't sure he'd ever heard Walt say 'oh my god.'"Wait, is that your typ- hey, Barba...or do I call you Rafael here?"

The lawyer raised an eyebrow as he approached the table. "I wouldn't, Detective."

Sonny still had a loose smiled because of the alcohol. Walt was pink and Sonny knew the liquor wasn't his problem. 

"I had no idea you were..." Barba began. 

"What, this guy? He's not." Walt pointed his thumb at Sonny. "Just a good friend."

"Barba this is my girlfriends little brother, Walt." Sonny introduced. 

"Oh so there's a girlfriend."

"Who cares about Alex?" Walt shrugged. "I'm the much cuter sibling. Hola!"

Walt held out his hand. Rafael put down his drink to shake it. Sonny just watched the pair eye each other, curious about how this was going to play out. 

Sonny wiggled his fingers in the direction of the rocks glass Rafael had put down. He leaned closer to it to get a sniff of the amber liquid within. "Whatcha got there?" 

Both men snapped out of the intense eye fucking they'd been giving each other to look over at Sonny and his loose limbs. 

"Jameson, neat." Rafael gave Sonny the same level of attitude he would at any other time of day. 

Sonny rolled his eyes and squeezed his lips. "I'm getting another beer. You guys want? No," he held up a hand. "Of course you don't."

"So, Counselor..." Sonny overheard Walt say as he walked away. 

'He sounds like Alex...Detective.' He thought hearing Alex's seductive tone. 

"What are you havin' slim?" A dark haired man asked Sonny as he approached the bar. 

"Oh I'm just gettin a beer." Sonny explained. 

He smiled. "Alright. Two Stellas!" He called. 

"Oh hey man..." Sonny started to protest. 

"Shh, just let it happen." The man continued to grin. 

Sonny smiled back uncomfortably. 

"You here with anybody?" He asked. 

"Um..." Sonny looked back to their table it was dark but he could just make out 2 figures sitting much closer together than they had been when he left. "Uh, no..."

"What's your name?" The guy asked. 

"Sonny." He answered shortly. The bartender returned with the beers and Sonny quickly grabbed his. 

"Sonny, how New York!" He commented. 

"Thanks for the, uh..." Sonny shook the beer bottle back and forth. 

"Oh c'mon where are you going?" He started to follow him back to the table but must've seen Sonny's terrified expression. 

Sonny sat back down. "You're right, I almost got penetrated."

"Excuse me, honey?" A sassy black man was sitting where Walt had been a few minutes ago. 

"Oh sorry." Sonny apologized. "My friends..."

"Fancy suit man took the toy soldier over there." He waved his hand in the general direction. "Aren't you a little straight for this place?"

Sonny grinned. "You can tell?"

He looked Sonny up and down. "You are very straight and you should watch out some guys like the challenge."

Sonny laughed. "I'm just here with...the toy soldier, it's my girlfriend'a brother."

"How adorable!" He smiled and sipped his drink. "I'm Richard."

"Sonny." He held out his hand. 

"Nice firm handshake. So are you an army brat too?" Richard motioned back to he direction Walt and Rafael had gone. 

"Nope." Sonny shook his head. "I'm a cop actually, a detective."

"Oh!" Richard sounded impressed. "Well as cliche as it is I'm a hairdresser."

He handed over his card. Sonny read it. 

"You should come by. Looks like you need a trim." He surveyed Sonny's head. 

"Yeah it grows pretty fast." Sonny agreed. "Thanks, I'll keep it-"

His phone buzzed from his pocket. 

"Having fun? Do you have a boyfriend yet? Are you leaving me for Walt?" Alex texted.

"Girlfriend?" Richard asked watching Sonny's face as he read. 

"Yeah." Sonny had a slight smile as he replied. 

"So tell me all about her."

"Oh sorry." Sonny realized he was being rude on his phone. 

"I can tell you're still in that honeymoon stage. It's probably all sex." He grinned.

Sonny shrugged but grinned. "Yeah..."

"Look at that smile. I bet you're all in love with her." Richard smiled. 

"That obvious?" Sonny smirked. 

Richard nodded. "Let me guess. Hmm? You've only been seeing her a few months. She's...from here but you only met her now. She's real cute, I bet..."

Sonny beamed. 

"Mm judging by that look I'm right. All the boys like her, but she likes you. She asked you out first!" He guessed. "So tell me about it. She works with you or something too."

Sonny smiled. "No she's a nurse. But we live in the same building. She, uh, she kinda hadda crush on me..."

"Aha!"

"We've been together like, 3 months." Sonny estimated. "She's from Long Island. And she's...a feisty one. Stubborn as all hell..."

"You like that, though." Richard nodded. 

"Yeah, it's kinda sexy. When it's not driving me crazy." Sonny took a drink. 

"Believe me I only sleep with men who give me a hard time. A little ball-busting is an aphrodisiac." Richard explained. 

Sonny laughed. "It's kind of our signature move."

"Oh who's your friend?" Walt had reappeared, with Barba right over his shoulder. 

"This is Richard." Sonny motioned with his bottle. 

Richard held out his hand. "Au chante."

"Walt, Rafael." Walt pointed to himself and then to Barba. Sonny noticed a slightly disheveled look to both men. Walt's cheeks were still bright pink.

"What have you two been-" Sonny started. 

"You cool if I leave?" Walt cut him off. 

"Night's over?" Sonny looked at Barba, who remained silent but who, Sonny noticed, had a hand on the small of Walt's back. 

Walt just raised his eyebrows at Sonny. Sonny smirked. 

"So you can get the train or whatever back to your place?" Walt asked. 

"Yeah sure. I'll be fine."

"Awesome, bye Son." Walt immediately turned. 

"See ya at the office then Rafael?" Sonny smirked. 

"Goodbye, Detective Carisi." Barba nodded curtly. 

Sonny just laughed as the two men disappeared through the crowd.  
****  
Today

"I don't know how much I had to do with it..." Sonny shook his head. 

"He wouldn't have come over if not for you being there!" Walt insisted. 

"And you wouldn't have approached him? Give me a break." Sonny rolled his eyes. 

Alex laughed.

"What?" Sonny asked. 

"I like that you guys are totally bros now." She smirked. 

"Yeah I might need more help, bro." Walt asked Sonny. 

"I don't think I have anymore gay co-workers." He laughed. 

"No with Raf." He blushed. 

"Aw you have a crush!" Alex grinned 

Walt sighed. "He peppers in Spanish when he talks and it's so cute. And he's such a sharp dresser, too. I peeked in his closet while he was showering. I swear to god it's like a display at Barney's."

Sonny smiled at Walt. "So what do you need my help with, or do you just wanna list off things you like about him?"

"Just tell me stuff about him. What's he like as an ADA?" Walt propped his chin on his elbows. 

"Uh," Sonny reached for the box of Cheerios and served another bowl. "He really knows what he's doing. He really knows his stuff, ya know?"

"Yeah, he does!" Walt interjected. 

"Jesus, Walt! Do you want me to tell you about him or not?!" Sonny complained. 

Alex laughed. "Let him have his crush, Sonny."

"He suddenly sounds like teenage girl!"

"Well I'm not. I'm a man. With a brunch date." Walt grinned. "He invited me to brunch! Like who does that!?"

"Adults." Sonny rolled his eyes. "This is so weird."

"What am I gonna wear? He's going to look incredible. I bet his day off clothes are more expensive than my whole wardrobe."

Sonny took another bite of cereal. "I can ask my sister to take you shopping. She helped me buy all my work stuff. She loves that crap."

"Whoa hey hello?" Alex waved her arms. "I'm your sister I can take you date shopping."

Walt rolled his eyes. "You just told me you want your boyfriend to grow a pornstache."

"Hey!" Alex yelled. 

"No offense Al but I don't think I can trust you to dress a man."

She pouted. 

"Don't worry baby, you can dress me." Sonny kissed her cheek. 

"Undress you maybe." She wiggled her eyebrows. 

"Don't I have to pass a test before you undress me again?" Sonny rolled his eyes. 

"Oh how cute." Walt said with sass. "But right now this is about me and my date with a lawyer!"

Sonny turned back to Walt. "Yeah I'd be nervous about goin' on a date with Barba."

"It's so weird you call him Barba!" Walt laughed. 

"Well it's not like we're best friends." Sonny smirked. 

Sonny's phone buzzed and Alex picked it up. 

"Rollins texted you. You have work today?"

"Shit!" Sonny groaned. "I promised the sarge I'd come in today and finish my homework, Amanda too."

"Your homework?"Alex laughed. 

"Paperwork!" He corrected. "And I guess now I'm doing it hungover."

"Say hi to Raf for me." Walt grinned as Sonny got up from the table. 

"Oh yeah that's my priority." He rolled his eyes. He leaned down to kiss Alex goodbye. 

"Don't forget you have your test tomorrow." She reminded. 

He groaned. "I haven't forgotten."

"Okay. I believe in you." Alex smiled. "I'm gonna go sleep because I'm on at 7 again. Walt, you stayin'?"

"No, I gotta hop on the train. Schwartz's closes early and I need some macaroons!"

"They're kosher not 0 calories!" Alex called out at him.  
****


End file.
